There are a lot of things guys care about, like Buffalo wings, sports, video games, cheese (yes, cheese!), baseball hats — and, yeah, we also care about girls: how often you call, what your friends say about us, and (secretly) if you like our hair. But then there are the other things about you — the ones we don’t give a hoot about. So if you’re spending time worrying about any of this stuff, please stop. Because the truth is, we don’t care...
...that you cut a centimeter off your hair. Guys are pretty observant. Like, if you suddenly chop off all of your hair, we’ll notice. But we probably won’t notice a trim. It’s not that you don’t look great with your new haircut, it’s just that to us a haircut means a pretty obvious shave with clippers — not “an inch off the bottom to get rid of split ends.” Heck, we don’t really even know what a split end is.
...if your room is messy. We get it. You woke up late and had to hurry out. And you sometimes leave clothes lying around for weeks. Let me ask you this: Have you ever seen a guy’s room? Okay, then! The fact is, clean rooms always get dirty again. So trying to keep things spotless is futile. We get it.
...about the color on your fingernails and/or toenails. What you do with your nails is just about as far from our orbit of interests as you can get. The only way we’re going to start caring about your nails is if you stop cutting them and they get so long that they start curling in on themselves. That would be gross.
...what you bought at the mall last weekend. You know when your guy calls and is like, “Babe! I got a 100 percent in Guitar Hero and I used star power and...” then you glaze over? That’s pretty much how we feel about your shopping adventures. The majority of girls aren’t interested in video games; the majority of guys aren’t into the mall.
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